Are you noticing your parents or your spouse behaving a little “odd”? Could it be Alzheimer’s or other dementia?

Written By Judy King

When Behavior Changes May Be a Sign of Memory Decline 

The other day, I overheard two women talking at lunch. One of them was upset about her parents’ behavior. Her father was acting in unusual ways—ignoring when his wife needed help, spending money recklessly, and even giving away a car. The daughter couldn’t understand why her mother didn’t say something to him. 

What these women may not have realized is that these behaviors could be early signs of memory loss or dementia. Families often feel confused and frustrated when they see a loved one change in ways that don’t make sense. But these changes are not “just bad behavior.” They may be symptoms of a brain that is beginning to struggle. 

Understanding what to look for can help families get medical advice sooner, which can lead to better care and planning. 

Signs to Look For 

Here are some common signs that may point to memory decline or dementia: 

  • Forgetting names, dates, or recent events often 

  • Trouble managing money or paying bills 

  • Misplacing items in unusual places (like keys in the freezer) 

  • Difficulty following conversations or losing their train of thought 

  • Struggling with familiar tasks, like cooking or driving a known route 

  • Mood changes, such as anger, sadness, or confusion 

  • Withdrawing from family or social activities 

  • Repeating questions or stories many times 

  • Seeming unaware when help is needed 

Other Possible Causes for Memory Decline 

Not all memory problems mean Alzheimer’s or dementia. Sometimes other health conditions are to blame, and many can be treated. These include: 

  • Stress, anxiety, or depression 

  • Poor sleep or sleep apnea 

  • Side effects of certain medications 

  • Vitamin deficiencies (like B12) 

  • Thyroid problems 

  • Urinary tract infections (UTIs), especially in older adults 

  • Head injuries 

  • Alcohol or substance use 

  • Hearing or vision loss that makes the brain work harder 

Encouraging your loved one to see a doctor is the best way to know what’s really happening. 

Possible Solutions 

If your loved one is living with Alzheimer’s or dementia, it’s important to respond with patience, kindness, and gentle words. Below are nine common behaviors and ways to respond that can help calm the moment: 

Behavior: Repeating the same question again and again 
Response: Answer calmly each time or gently distract with a new activity. 

Behavior: Forgetting how to do a daily task 
Response: Offer step-by-step help without taking over completely. 

Behavior: Accusing others of stealing 
Response: Reassure them, avoid arguing, and help look for the item together. 

Behavior: Wandering or wanting to “go home” 
Response: Validate their feelings, then redirect with a walk, snack, or soothing activity. 

Behavior: Getting angry or frustrated 
Response: Stay calm, lower your voice, and give them space until they feel safe again. 

Behavior: Refusing to bathe or change clothes 
Response: Offer choices (“blue shirt or green shirt?”), keep it simple, and make it feel like their decision. 

Behavior: Talking to people who aren’t there 
Response: Don’t correct or shame them; listen kindly and offer comfort. 

Behavior: Trouble eating or forgetting how to use utensils 
Response: Use finger foods or demonstrate gently without drawing attention. 

Behavior: Seeming sad or withdrawn 
Response: Sit with them, hold their hand, and invite them to join an easy, enjoyable activity. 

Final Thoughts 

Behavior changes in parents or loved ones can be confusing and painful to watch. But remember, these are often signs of changes in the brain—not intentional actions. Early medical care can help rule out treatable causes, slow the progression of dementia, and give families time to plan. 

Education and support can make a huge difference. You can be the one that makes the difference in how your person is cared for. You can be their Hero and advocate. Learn what you can, there is a great deal of information available. Be sure to use medical sites for your research. There is also a great deal of misleading information about a cure. This is not true. Unfortunately currently there isn’t a cure for Alzheimer’s or dementia.  But until there is a cure, we can CARE enough to learn a kinder, gentler way of living with a person that has this disease.  

Would you like to learn more?  Click here to send an email: Live With Dementia. 

Judy King

Welcome to Arms of Grace Respite Care, llc. My name is Judy, and I am deeply passionate about supporting care partners who walk the challenging yet rewarding path of caring for someone living with Alzheimer’s or other dementia. With over 16 years as a business owner and a lifetime of varied experiences, I’ve cultivated a heart-centered approach to care that emphasizes compassion, understanding, and empowerment.

My journey has been shaped by firsthand experience with conditions such as Parkinson’s, primary progressive multiple sclerosis, spinal cord injury, Alzheimer’s, and common geriatric issues.

To better serve care partners, I pursued CNA training and furthered my education through Teepa Snow’s Positive Approach to Care, which provides invaluable insights into brain changes in those living with Alzheimer’s. I remain committed to staying informed, reading current research on Alzheimer’s disease weekly, and volunteering at an assisted living community I previously worked at. I provide a Chair exercise program that promotes Neuroplasticity. It is named Ageless Grace(timeless fitness for the body and brain).

Beyond my professional life, I am a wife, mother, grandmother, and someone who finds joy in the outdoors, crafting, and helping others. I am here to guide you with compassion and practical tools to navigate the complexities of caregiving. Together, we can ensure that you and your loved one feel supported every step of the way.

https://livewithdementia.com
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